Are You Tired of Trying to Be Perfect?

Some years ago, I wrote a poem (while in therapy) about how exhausting it was to try to be perfect.  A lifetime of trying to win the blue ribbon and get straight A’s had taken it’s toll and taken me to the edge with anxiety.

Especially since I had made so many mistakes the older I got.  How could have been married and divorced twice?  How could I have messed up my eating so badly that I became prediabetic, even while following to the letter what the experts had told me to do?  How could I have made such life changing decisions that turned out so wrong?

It’s called being human.

How about you?  Have you been trying to be perfect your whole life?  Isn’t it exhausting?

Here is the poem.  I am no poet, but it described my feelings exactly.

I Don’t Wanna’ Be Perfect

I don’t wanna be perfect

I’m tired of the strain,

To always mind my P’s and Q’s

When planning to entertain.

I don’t wanna be perfect

To dress with things just right,

To act my age and be mature

And not have the nerve to fight.

I don’t wanna be perfect

I learned it early on,

From Mom and Dad and generations past

Miss Priss, I want her gone!

I don’t wanna be perfect

I want to have some fun,

To act a fool and not care a whit

Doing anything under the sun.

I don’t want to be perfect

I just want to be myself,

To live and love and laugh with glee

And to please only one – Himself.

 

The question is:  How do you let go of that need to be perfect?  How do you have some fun and loosen up?

That is a work in progress for me.  I still try and get everything right.  Do things the way the experts say.  It’s interesting that when I do let go – surrender – things start to shift.  Relief  starts easing in.

The anxiety and depression lesson considerably.  I feel more open to possibility.  That is freeing.

One of the keys is to examine your thoughts and beliefs.  Chances are they have been with you a long time and are reluctant to let go.  Those thought and belief loops are well ingrained.

But –

Your thoughts can be changed and that can lead to less anxiety, less pressure, more joy.

I will talk more about how to change your thoughts and beliefs in my next blog post.  Meanwhile, start writing down all your thoughts (a thought download) in areas were you are suffering.  Where you are stuck.  Where you are having trouble moving forward.

Awareness of these is the first step to letting go of the need to be perfect and getting everything right.  Understanding how you got to where you are.

Stay tuned.  If you would like to have a conversation about where you are now and where you would like to be, shoot me an email at jane@janespringer.com.  I’d love to hear from you!