This is a tale about the chocolate chip cookie and my love affair with it. It all started when I was just a little girl and my mother made some Tollhouse chocolate chip cookies.
Sublime doesn’t even cover how I felt about the experience. Love at first bite. Raise your hand if you are with me.
Thus began my lifelong love affair with the chocolate chip cookie. Once we were old enough, we started making them ourselves. The secret was we made them with Crisco instead of butter, like the recipe said. Made them soft, yet crispy, on the edges. Perfection.
We made many batches – much better than Chips Ahoy or any other store-bought. And the cookie cured many ills and soothed many emotional times. You see, beginning when I was about 9 or so, my parents fought. A lot. Mostly after we went to bed, but I could still hear them. Times were rocky.
They separated when I was 10 and divorced when I was 12. Much fighting and vitriol with my father. My mother began to drink heavily. Maybe she did it before then, I just wasn’t aware. But when I came home from school, I never knew what I would find. Commence making chocolate chip cookies. Mmm, mmm. Good. Ever been there?
Throughout my life, not only did making the perfect cookie give me a great sense of satisfaction, I often shared with friends and co-workers and they were delighted. I loved baking with my daughter. Baking has gotten me through many a tough time – with alcoholic husbands and even recovering from mononeucleosis (when I had to gain weight!). I have deviated occasionally by making blonde brownies, a cousin of the cookie, or oatmeal chocolate chip cookies, which my husband loves. All good.
As I have gotten older, though, I have had to be careful with the weight gain associated with eating too many cookies. I had to reign myself in and set some boundaries.
Then in 2009, I was diagnosed with gluten sensitivity, which I later found out was celiac disease. One of my first thoughts was, “I’ll never be able to have my beloved chocolate chip cookies again. This stinks!” Then I started working on making them with other types of flours besides wheat, trying to duplicate a Tollhouse cookie. No luck. Many baking disasters.
Enter Pamela’s gluten-free chocolate chunk cookie mix. Because I can’t eat gluten, soy, dairy or egg, I make them with applesauce and non-butter butter. They turn out pretty darn good. And I have fun making them with my granddaughter. One problem.
I began making them when I was upset, or tired, or stressed. Is this you? Asking my granddaughter if she wanted to make them, even when she hadn’t asked. Of course, she always said yes. Always soothing and giving me energy. I had to take a hard look at this habit.
Having gained a few extra pounds and having recent blood tests that were perfect, except for a higher inflammation reading than I like, I knew I had to cut back on sugar. I am hoping that by cutting back on sugar, I will have less joint and muscle pain. This cookie-making is a sugar indulgence. So I set a boundary. No cookie baking for a certain amount of time. I also eliminated a protein bar I was eating or a snack – peanut butter chocolate chip, no less. It has 14 grams of sugar!
I am not outlawing cookie baking altogether. I have enough restrictions on my eating and diet as it is. And making them and having one brings me joy. But I always plan it in advance, and don’t do it impulsively to make up for some upset or stressed out moment. I usually send the extras to my husband’s work, so the temptation is not around.
This works for me.
Do you have a love affair with a certain food? If so, can you set a boundary around preparing or eating it? Like I did. It may be that it’s easier not to have it in the house for a while. I do that, too. Like around dark chocolate covered cashews. I set a time and place, allow myself to have a few and then get rid of them. Also, no impulse eating justbecause I am tired.
This tale has a happy ending. I can still enjoy my beloved chocolate chip cookie, just with some boundaries. And that makes me happy. Life is good.
If this is resonating for you {and I know it is} then do not waste another moment. You know you need help with setting boundaries around food and if you don’t know it, well you need my help even more!
Contact me and in 15 minutes I will get you clear on the next 1-3 steps you can take to get over your love affair with cookies, caramel rolls or ice cream. This is what I do for women like you every day. Don’t hesitate or second guess, contact me now!
Let me know about your love affair with cookies or any other kind of food in the comments below. I know I’m not the only one with a Tollhouse love affair!
Jane Springer is a certified Life, Wellness and Style Coach who assists women in taking care of themselves, in body, mind and spirit. She coaches women who want to lose weight, avoid diabetes, and feel great. She also helps them thrive after divorce. She also helps them to clear their closets of old clothes and outdated attitudes, so they can shine and feel confident.